There's light at the end of the tube?

IT MAKES PERFECT ECONOMIC SENSE, and so it was bound to happen. But with it's occurrence, another little tool of collective childhood imagination begins to slip away. The bathroom tissue roll tube is being displaced.

In July, quasi-paper company Kimberly-Clark announced its intentions in a press release that read, "Ever wonder why there's a hole and a cardboard core in the middle of a roll of bath tissue? Because that's how it is inserted into the spindle to roll it, right? Well, bath tissue manufacturer Kimberly-Clark has decided to fill the hole with . . . you guessed it, more bath tissue." Competitor Georgia-Pacific has a similar product that has a hole that is pencil-sized.

But what about those of us who don't want the hole filled?

THE WHOLE HOLE. The Kimberly-Clark release goes on to say, "The company has introduced KLEENEX COTTONELLE Coreless Tissue and SCOTT Coreless Tissue, which easily retrofit into traditional dispensers using handy adapters, approximately 3/4-in. by 1 1/2-in., that gently press an indentation into the tissue to hold it in place. And with the hole filled in, coreless tissue provides double the number of sheets of bath tissue on a roll versus Kimberly-Clark's standard sized rolls, making it perfect for busy areas such as office buildings, stadiums, schools, restaurants and manufacturing facilities." I like the marketing language--"easily retrofit," "handy adapters," "gently press an indentation," and "perfect for busy areas." But having scavenged in the bathroom for springs and spindles when trying to replace a new roll, I expect the reality may be less than "gentle" or "perfect."

Thankfully, this hole-less roll is being first introduced into commercial and industrial (C&I) markets and not the at-home market where the supply of toilet paper cores are most critical. I say "critical" because these small, leftover pieces of paperboard tubing are the stuff by which children's imaginations are fueled.

In the combined lifetimes of my daughter and me, I have known these tubes to be: a megaphone; a doll's cast; a cardboard train's smokestack; the dagger to a matching sword (made from a wrapping paper tube); a tribal warrior's blow gun; a tunnel for Hot Wheels and Matchbox racetracks; the handles for homemade pom-pons; the stem for a barbell; and a cat or dog toy. The list could be endless.

There's still some sense of excitement when seeing the beginnings of dark gray as an old tissue roll runs out. Unfortunately, that excitement has been tempered by the more adult debate of "over" versus "under" tissue distribution.

A TUBELESS WORLD? Hopefully it will be a long time before these new hole-less rolls and their associated gadgets move to the home market. One of Kimberly-Clark's vice presidents, quoted in an Associated Press article, says that the abundant styles of home dispensers is an overwhelming obstacle. "It's a tremendous retrofit for 100 million households," he told the reporter.

And even in the C&I sector, there's some debate. Some of the janitorial services that have encountered these coreless contraptions have been divided about their usefulness, according to the Associated Press article.

An office tower manager in Boston told the Associated Press writer that he disliked the idea, saying that he decided against switching to the coreless roll because he did not want to be stuck with Kimberly-Clark's adapters in his 70 restrooms if the paper's price rose.

"We're already locked in with their soap dispensers," he said. "We don't want to get locked in with their toilet paper, too."

But a restroom manager of a 21-floor office building in New York who oversees 84 restrooms indicated that anything helping to reduce the number of tissue roll replacements would be welcome. “You got four public restrooms per floor, three toilets in the men’s and five in the ladies,” he said in the article. “It adds up, man.”

Again, all this makes perfect economic sense, and it’s likely that many customers will see the benefit of this coreless product. The facts from the article state that filling the hole approximately doubles the roll, while the price goes up only about 20%.

But for my daughter’s sake (and maybe my own, as well) I hope the hole and the tube doesn’t go away. You never know when you’ll need a megaphone. n